Bangkok Day 4-6

Sorry for the delays in my journal, everything has been moving very quickly. I am impressed by the number of you who have texted me asking for the next journal drop, I am honored. Aside from my small hate mail from certain individuals who shall not be named (Emily C. Chow, Evan Bimaputra, Alexander Ktan), everyone seems to be enjoying my journals. I have also gotten some criticism from my parents, as they have threatened to wash my mouth with soap and water upon my return back to the United States due to my use of profanity. I would like to put out a formal apology for my “potty mouth” and will censor inappropriate words with asterisks from here on out. Sorry mom and dad, I’m 21 years old and independent on the other side of the world, but I will restrain cursing for you. These next diaries will be a bit shorter, encountering the highlights of my week in Bangkok with the whole EY-Parthenon crew. Enjoy!

Bangkok Day 4

Starting back in the Bangkok airport, our first encounter was our Taxi driver attempting to scam us. Before we get into the car, I ask him, “how much?” and point to the area we want to go. Ignoring me, he puts our luggage in his car in silence with his head down and gave me extremely sus vibes. I persistently ask again. He goes into the car and we google translate, “how much will the taxi cost?” He then whips out his phone and pulls up his google translate and shouts into his phone, voice translating the price for us. He arrogantly adds on egregious fees and tells us the total. I look at him in disgust and we get out of there. We grab another car for half the price and route over to Gene’s place, exhausted from the rough flight and our Chiangmai excursions. We get back to Gene’s and hit the gym. After, we shower and get ready to go to Icon Siam, the new large mall on the other side of the river of Bangkok. We go to lunch at Ros’niyom and get a papaya salad with salted egg (Gene says it’s authentic because it’s cooked with small fried shrimp for taste), larb ped (spicy duck salad), grilled chicken thigh (so juicy and tender), sticky rice, and a stir-fried dry noodle with large shrimp and a plant called water mimosa. The larb ped and chicken thigh were my personal favorites because it was more garlicky and full of aroma. After, we head to a Japanese matcha coffee shop in the mall (I come to find out later that they have a store in Brooklyn, ummmmm catch me wasting my income away there) and devour a soft serve matcha on a waffle cone. High-quality matcha for a high-quality kind of girl. After, we venture to a 7/11 and buy a bunch of Thai snacks and SOJU!!!! The Soju was around $2 per bottle. You know we stacked those big boys up. Then, we head back and rest at home for a bit before heading to Lumphini park. After our rest, we get ready for dinner and walk over to the train station. At first glance, the train is so clean and futuristic looking. I got excited until Gene kindly told us that this newly built train system is absolute a**. Upon further investigation, I have come to the conclusion that the train system in Thailand is so terribly inefficient. There are different train systems operated by different companies, and to get to certain destinations we have to get off the first train system, exit that train station, buy a new ticket for another new train system, and then re-enter a new train station and board that train. Turns out, this is because some train lines were infamous for trafficking money back in the corrupt government days (tbh Thailand government still lowkey corrupt tho) which led to new companies coming in and building their own train lines. It's terribly inefficient. Totally unorganized with so many unnecessary bottlenecks in the process. Someone come fix the train system in Thailand for me plz, this can be your consulting project if you’re on the beach still (sorry that was a consulting joke). While we were on the train station platform waiting for the train, a woman comes up to me and asks me for directions. She thought I was a Thai #local. Then, I give a slightly panicked look to Gene to help me because I have no idea what map I'm looking at. Gene comes to the rescue to give the woman directions. The woman thought I look more Thai than Gene. SCORE!! Foreigner entrance fee who??? After a long, inefficient train ride, we arrive at Lumphini Park. It’s a cute little pathway for people to run or walk along, and there were so many people exercising. While we were walking, I heard a faint noise come out of the large stadium speakers, and then proceed to see everyone moving come to a stand still. I thought I was in a black mirror simulation. Turns out, at 6 AM and PM every day the Thai national anthem plays and everyone stays in place to respect the nation. Slay. We walk a bit, take some cute photos, and then head to the commons food court nearby. Erica and I shared a Thai-inspired Chinese chicken rice (same traditional white chicken in vinegar marination, different Thai sauce that was thicc and sweeter with a tang of spice, kind of like a variation of peking duck sauce). I topped off the meal with a mango avocado smoothie (sh*t was gassssss) and I went happily to sleep with a belly full.

Bangkok Day 5

We start off the day trip to the zoo! Gene’s dad picks us up from the train station and we go to the zoo together. There’s a foreigner fee and a regular Thai-citizen fee, and Erica and I just shut up while Gene and her dad sort out tickets (at the Thai-citizen rate yippie)! We walk around the zoo, see some cool tigers, a dolphin show, and a sea lion show. We kept making jokes at the sea lion show because there were 3 sea lions and the sea lion on the end was so lazy he just kept asking for treats for doing LITERALLY THE BARE MINIMUM! Meanwhile the other 2 sea lions were carrying their weight for the show. We joked that the lazy sea lion is just like an EY-Parthenon summer intern and that the other sea lions carrying the show are the associate and consultant pulling content for the client together. Sorry if you don’t understand that joke. After the shows, we go feed some sexy giraffes (carrots and small bananas), and gee jolly the giraffes are so selfish. I would feed one giraffe, he would eat a carrot happily, and then the next giraffe would be patiently waiting while I grab another carrot, and then when I go to feed the second giraffe, the first one would pop out of nowhere and steal the carrot from the second giraffe as I’m feeding it to him. It’s giving sibling rivalry. After, we go through a cool safari drive where we see all types of animals. We see zebras, more giraffes, hippos, rhinos, all types of birds, and more. Then, we drive through the dangerous animal zone where we find jaguars, lions and tigers. There was a school bus filled with kids in front of us on the Safari Drive and while we pulled up to the Lions section, King lion decided it was sexy time with mama lion and went onto her and started just doing his thang on her. Never thought I would see lions having sex but here we are. I wouldn’t change it for the world. The moment the lions started having sex, the kiddie bus zoomed away real fast. It was hysterical. After the Safari Drive, Gene‘s dad took us to a ratchet coconut truck stand on the side of the road and we got hella coconuts which are the cheapest and best on the market. The locals really know what they’re doing. The coconuts were so pure filled with goodness and hydration. After a long and fruitful day at the zoo, we order and food and just chill for the rest of the night.

Bangkok Day 6

Today was another restful day. We went to the gym in the morning, then went to accompany Erica to get her nails done, and then went to a ratchet sushi place underneath the nail salon and got sh*tty ass ice green tea and some fire sushi bowls. Tbh the ice green tea was half a scoop of horrible matcha powder and a ton of water. It tasted like seaweed water. I got the salmon bowl and it was quite fresh for the price. It reminded me a lot of Taiwan. After we went to a Japanese café where we got a Hojicha latte, black sesame espresso, an iced coconut latte, and a matcha tiramisu. It was so yummy and the hojicha made up for the horrible green tea we had at the sushi restaurant. Afterwards, we went to get an aromatherapy massage back at Health Land with Gene this time. This experience was quite different. This massage was double the price because of the oils used to massage the body. However, my review overall is that while I was quite comfortable, I realized I like more pain because no pain no gain. The woman caressed my butt cheeks for a long time and I felt like she was judging my million bruises and mosquito bites. A little quick sidenote is that both Erica and Gene fell asleep multiple times during the massage. What a troll move. They also both managed to drool during the massage. Even more troll! After our massages, we went to Saiyam square and did some shopping. I got a cute Aritzia effortless pants inspired pair of blue pants and a Brandy Melville inspired lavender purple tank top. After shopping, we returned home and met Alex who flew in from Jakarta and ordered food in for a bomb a** meal before waiting for the rest of the EYP gang to arrive. Thanks for following along! I have the next two days written out, but I will hold the journal entries to keep y’all on your toes. With love from South-east Asia, Michelle